Holidays without the Framily.

Living away from home, whether domestically or abroad often means sacrificing holidays with the family. This may conjure up images of sad sad people curled in the fetal position crying to beloved holiday tunes. If that sad sad person has been or will be you, I’m so sorry. My experiences with holidays away from home have been soopa wonderful. So wonderful, that as I prep to spend my first official holiday with Mr’s family (so excited!), I can’t help but sentimentally remember the people who became my family on major holidays over the last few years. To my dear Framily, you know who you are, I love you and miss you and wish you the best. Get back in my arms soon.

Thanksgiving 2005: Florence, Italy.

This was a boozy, floozy awesome event that started with pre-train breakfast burritos and tequila cappuccinos (don’t judge, it’s the Roman way), blossomed into afternoon Lambrusco and tiramisu, got kicky with tequila sunrises at a Mexican happy hour and completely degenerated into a sloppy mess during dinner with unlimited wine. I will always cringe when remembering the trip to the Ufizzi the next morning (please body, don’t puke on the Botticellis or Berninis, please?!) and the international (crying) drunk dial to my parents but it is a holiday I’ll always cherish.

Trust and believe we didn't look this pretty a few hours later.

Personal Image

Thanksgiving 2008: Sioux Falls, South Dakota

Sure I was home but I came bringing joy from the South. Weekend highlights included Darryl and Thomas seeing their first dear a-hanging from the garage ceiling (good job, Dad!), an epic sister food fight (totally normal) and trying to teach Pops Apples to Apples (maybe you should stick to hunting, Dad).

Happy Thanksgiving (and Birthday, Thomas!)

Personal Image

Christmas 2008: Stillwater, Minnesota

First Christmas with the Mr and we both had to work December 24th and 26th. Enter my HLP’s (heterosexual life parter) family and some fondue. So. Much. Goodness.

This is not a picture from Christmas but it includes key players.

Personal Image

Christmas 2009: Seoul, Korea

An expat potluck that ended in late night noraebong and included some magical Christmas Eve snow(ball fights). We swore we’d go home at midnight as we all had early morning flights to catch. We did not. I had so much rage waiting for the Terry’s AND the airport shuttle at 5am the next morning.

A Bromace is all fun and games until you have to get up two hours after you go to sleep.

Personal Image

Thanksgiving 2010: Seoul, Korea

Wintertime was in production but that did not stop me from celebrating Thanksgiving three times! A Wednesday dinner with the Mr, Thursday potluck AND a Saturday super splurge real deal Turkey Dinner from the US military base (if you live abroad you should look into this; so cheap, so good).

Lisa adorably enjoys her pie. I devour.

Personal Image

Family, Framily or both; who are you celebrating with this year?

Youtube pick-me-ups.

Monday morning in the office getting you down? Perhaps it’s a lack of office that has you down in the dumps? Never fear, watch one (or all) of these a time or two (or seven) and I guarantee you’ll have some pep in your step to carry you through.

1. Jimmy Kimmel challenged parents to tell their kids they had eaten ALL of the Halloween candy. Here’s the selection that aired BUT if you’re really in need of a time filler there’s a whole mess of submitted videos. Some of the kids are adorbs. Some make me a little scared to procreate.

 

2. Did you watch the AMA’s last night? If you felt meh about Nikki Minaj’s combo of Turn Me On and Super Bass check out little Miss Sophia Grace and her hype girl Rosie. Then think about watching their performance on Ellen. Delish.

 

3. Are feeling another dreadful Vikings loss hang-over? Commiserate with this little cutie who demontrates accutly what all Minnesota fans feel some all of the time. Gurrrl, we feel ya.

 

Are you hip on the internets and have already seen these? Send me some more. ASAP. pleaseandthanks.

How to talk to the (f)Unemployed.

Inappropriate:

Unemployed? Fuewf what a tough time for that, huh?

Have you tried _____ or _____ or ________ or ________? Oh…you did? Hm….

What do you DO all day??

Oh, your Mr. pays for everything?  You’re crossing over to the dark side…

Holding out for an NonProf job? How can you afford to do that?

You should go to those “Occupy” things.

Do you want a babysitting job for this weekend? You know, just for a little extra cash?

Why did you come back?

Appropriate:

What are you doing these days?

What are you looking for?

I’m sure you’ll find something!

Enjoy the time off!

While you’e got time your should read/watch _______. It’s great!

Let’s get together!

An open letter to travelers (Including myself)

Dear Traveler,

I am so glad you went ______. Of course, it was awesome and I will happily listen to your top five stories. Eventually. However, basically, no one cares. Sorry. Did that hurt? I don’t mean to invalidate your awesome experiences however, I’m feeling _______ (bored, jealous, both) about the whole thing. Now, it might be me projecting my feelings onto you but I can’t handle hearing awesome OR dull stories about your life in _______. Especially if you have become that special and noxious breed of traveler dripping in self-righteousness. If you’ve picked up that from your travels there is no known cure, good luck.

That charming cultural difference? I don’t get it. You went _______ and felt ________ (excited, moved, sad)? If your description is longer than a Facebook picture description, I’m bored. You met ______ from _______ and totally bonded over _______? I didn’t. People bond most over shared experiences with a light salting of  stories from times gone by. Let’s do that. Even if it means we have to laugh over the same stories we did before you left. Those are the reasons we’re friends. Also, that ______ you got me was so thoughtful. Thank you! However, if it is accompanied by a 20 minute epic tale, please take it back.

I hope we can still be friends because I still like you,

________

ED Note: This is in response to the case of travel over-share I had for like, two months. I think it’s clearing up now. Sorries.

Blog Lovin’: I think we’re friends.

So. As you can tell from my “Funemployment” schedule. I spend A LOT of time on the internets. I am a goog reader devotee, to the max, totes mcgoats. In fact, some of the blogs are so well written and personable; I think I’m friends with their respective writers. No, I’m not a sociopath. I’m just unemployed.

The popular kids I want to be friends with: The writers of The Tangential. They are dry, funny and ohsocool. My friend Carl is ACTUALLY friends with them and it makes me feel cooler and jealous, simultaneously.

The woman I secretly want to be: Mrs. Lilien. She’s ohsostylish AND she rhymes. She also makes me feel like the personal time I have right now is totally justifiable if I’m wearing a fab outfit.

The cool couple with the adorbz kid: Sherry and John at Young House Love. They are parents of a little cutie who has an awesome goon-ie smile. They are sweet, funny and ohsogood at making me think I need to buy a house RIGHT NOW. I could be them OR be friends with them. Whateves.

The sass pot with an empire: Perez. enough said.

Do you crush on any writers via reader?

Funemployed

I have been Funemployed for three months. The first two months were spent in Vietnam, visiting family, weddings and general readjustment to English everywhere ( in the words of my friends Lisa, “I feel like a mind reader!”) and easily procured cheese. That man I went to Korea with? He got himself a great job because his skillz are off the chain. Now I fill my days with things I find personally rewarding with his support (both financial and emotional). When I’m not interviewing (I’ve been on 10, more on that later) how do I spend my time? Well kids, the key to a productive life is a well followed schedule.

My Days (usually):

8:00 Wake up to Mr’s alarm

8:30 Drink coffee and catch up on the internets.

9:00 Watch Regis and Kelly, drink coffee, internets, pack Mr.’s lunch

9:30 Sweet kisses for my hard working Mr.

10:00 The View and internets. One cup of cereal. One cup of milk. coffee

11:00 Dishes, shower, bed making, weather checking, errands

11:30 Job Hunt

12:00 Start Dinner (If needed, treat making)

12:30 Job Hunt

2:00 Internets

3:00 Job Hunt

4:00 Ellen and Internets. One cup of cereal. One cup of milk. Coffee

5:00 Dinner prep, cleaning, Job Hunt

6:00 Dinner prep, candle lighting, Internets

6:30 My sweetheart returns, dinner is eaten

7:00 Meetings, reading, TV

11:00 Off to Bed

Raindrops on roses and Savage Umbrella

So, something super exciting happened. I was asked to be a company member of Savage Umbrella. I squealed. Obvi. Not only is SU a compilation of some of the nicest, most fun artists I know, They make really good theatre. Seriously. I am so honored to be a part of something so special. To support me in my latest artistic venture, pop on over to NE Minneapolis. Eat dinner at Hazel’s and take in Savage Umbrella’s latest production The Ravagers. Don’t go see the show just because I said so, Matthew and Ed both agree that it’s awesome.

Get thee to The Hollywood

(Image via Savage Umbrella)